Can a Spouse Destroy a Will and Say It Never Existed?

Ethically and legally, no of course not.
But practically, yes, if she has the original will. Here’s why:
Presumed revoked: if a person’s will is lost or disappears while in his own possession, it’s considered intentionally revoked/destroyed.
This means that even if you can find a signed copy (say, on file with the attorney), it won’t matter because legally the will is considered rescinded
So, you should keep your original will with your attorney or file it with the court.
This way if the original gets lost, or destroyed, it is possible to still use a copy (not easy, but possible).
[Previously posted on Quora]
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